is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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