I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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