She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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