Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
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