So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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