Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize