turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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