even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
They have beer where we have blood.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Never joke about your clitoris.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
