this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
