some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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