it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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