What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
