You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
