is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
