He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
How external is "for external use only"?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
third nipple confirmed
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
