Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
