and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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