oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
