Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
