I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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