He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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