Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
