I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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