happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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