Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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