Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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