I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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