she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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