Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
