Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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