Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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