I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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