I feel great
I just peed on a car
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just want to make out with him forever
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
