My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
