love makes seman taste better
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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