He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
