Its about making memories worth repressing
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
