is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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