Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
