So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Randomize
