in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
