Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
We left the knife in your bed.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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