she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
