I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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