I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
it's great music for shaving your balls
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
