i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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