But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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