Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
