i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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