she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
