At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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