just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
